Chipmunks, Turtles, & Hobbits

I am the youngest of three girls. I have always felt it…and I suppose I am designed to always be it. When we were kids, we tended to compare ourselves with other (fictional) trios or groups.

The Chipmunks: I was Theodore, the chubby, naïve one who liked food. Or Eleanor, his counterpart in the Chipettes. As I type, I am eating Tostitos with Lime…not quite as good as their Lime N Chili chips that were discontinued forever ago, but a close enough second.

Teenaged Mutant Ninja Turtles? I was Leonardo because blue was my favorite color…but even he was the most boring of the ninja turtles. The responsible one. When I turned 18, I bought myself a life insurance policy because that was what I thought responsible people did. When I got my first job with benefits, I went to the dentist every six months, and the doctor and optometrist annually, because that’s what I thought I was supposed to do. Even when I live vicariously through fictional characters, I’m the boring one.

The Lion, The Witch, and The Wardrobe? As the youngest, I defaulted to Lucy, but I identified more with Edmond…the bitter, selfish child who gorges on Turkish Delight. Yep, that sounds more like me.

My sisters were most like the Disney heroines Esmerelda from “The Hunchback of Notre Dame” and Pocahontas or Jasmine…I was Belle from Beauty & The Beast only because Belle always had her nose stuck in a book, as did I. And I’m pretty sure the neighbors thought I was odd…they probably still do.

I wanted to be one of Charlie’s Angels, a smart, beautiful investigator who could defend herself against thugs twice her size. I thought MacGyver was cool because I liked the idea of being able to use everyday objects as creative resources when he didn’t have a weapon. I wanted to be like Hillary Swank in the Next Karate Kid. Or Electra (I have to say, after I started learning how to use them, I thought the sai were pretty fun). Michelle Yeoh and Zhang Ziyi from “Crouching Tiger, Hidden Dragon?” They could hold their own. Katniss Everdeen? She’s a survivor. Merida from “Brave”? Total badass with both a bow and a sword. I realize these characters were my role models, even my heroes. I have lived vicariously through their stories. Wonder Woman? I’m nowhere near tall enough. But Black Widow? She’s a trained assassin. Jason Bourne? Yes, please.

I wanted to be like Ranger, but I end up feeling more like Stephanie Plum. No matter how hard he tries, Theodore will never be Jason Bourne. So, while “fantasy me” aspires to be the Black Widow, sometimes the “real me” sulks and my inner hobbit finds second breakfast .

Eventually, after hours or days of brooding, I remember that one of my favorite shows growing up was “Punky Brewster” …the show about a quirky girl with mis-matched clothes and her own sense of…well, everything. Despite being abandoned, she was always optimistic and embraced her idiosyncratic personality. She even had a dog.

Then I see my daughter, with her kind little hobbit heart, kissing her dogs good-bye in the mornings. With her mismatched socks and hastily-combed hair, she re-enacts fight scenes from the TV show Arrow. She’s got a healthy dose of Punky Power and a dash of Mulan…things that maybe, just maybe, she got from me.

Original Post 10/2020