A Rock is a Hard Spot

I recruited my 9-year-old daughter, Zoe, to go indoor rock-climbing with me this week. Yeah, I know it isn’t part of the “great OUTdoors” per se, but sometimes you just gotta improvise. Plus, I’m not sure why, but I thought it would be easier than “real” rock-climbing…perhaps because of all the colorful anchors reminiscent of an elementary school.

Zoe and I arrived at the Focus Climbing Center in Mesa shortly after noon. Once we signed the waivers, (complete with the if-you-die-you-can’t-sue-us clause), we listened to the friendly staff member give the mandatory orientation, complete with my constant interruptions to ask him to repeat things when I didn’t catch exactly what he said. He led us over to the first climbing wall, which had a large pad a few feet thick where you could safely fall from the wall. He had us each climb to three (slightly) different heights and execute controlled falls to practice falling the “right” way. It’s a bit disconcerting how the mind does not want you to fall, even though you are specifically trying to do so. But, I eventually fell, landing mostly according to plan, on my feet, then rolling to my back.  Zoe was up next and fell like a pro, grinning ear to ear, eager to do it again.

Next, we got our shoes. The staff member warned us that the shoes were supposed to be at a “tolerable level of discomfort” to keep your toes curled. However, as a tennis-shoe kind of girl, I gave up wearing uncomfortable shoes years ago and truly cannot function if my feet hurt — that’s an excellent recipe for turning a cranky woman into Godzilla.  So I figured it would be best to not make my feet — and therefore me — completely miserably by going up an extra shoe size, yet still uncomfortable but bearable. Ditto for the child. Then we got suited up in our harnesses, which, although an odd sensation of having straps around your legs and hips, wasn’t bad at all. Our guide then led us to the “auto belay” station (i.e. the rock climbing stations where you can hook a safety rope to yourself for when you fall) which, by the way, does NOT have the two-foot squishy mat to break your fall. After making sure we knew how to clip ourselves to the safety line, he left us unsupervised and to our own devices.

Having never been rock-climbing before and now the sole adult responsible for letting my minor child climb up thirty feet in the air and get safely back down, I thought, “what the heck do I do now?” Luckily, this was not Zoe’s first time rock climbing and she volunteered to go first. Once we got her harness hooked up, she took to the wall like a little monkey. I was perfectly content standing back to watch her first climb up the wall. She got stuck halfway up before she climbed slowly back down and said it was my turn.

What else was there to do but start climbing the wall? I took my time, ensuring I had a good grip with both hands and feet before looking for my next anchor.  Halfway up, I felt my forearms burning thinking this was exactly as hard as I was certain it would be. I am proud to say I made it all the way to the top, despite being somewhat winded. However, I had no idea how to get down. I knew I could climb or “jump,” but jumping still felt wrong — as if I was abusing the safety harness and would get in trouble. So, I very awkwardly clambered my way back down and admitted I was ready to rest and watch Zoe have another go at it.

We took turns climbing up the same two beginner routes for the next half hour or so, all the while me wondering how much climbing I would be good for. Instead of getting easier with practice, it was getting harder because apparently my body is NOT used to rock-climbing and got fatigued much faster than I care to admit.

I did get up the guts to “fall” from the belay wall, although instinct compelled me to grab the rope so I wouldn’t plunge to my death…I fell at the leisurely and anticlimactic speed of a turtle. Once you get past the “am I really supposed to let go?” moment, falling was actually pretty fun. Even Zoe agreed and we dismounted a few times using our new discovery.

We tried the incrementally harder walls, which, instead of being vertical, have a slight overhang…we might have gotten a foot off the ground, but I had a blast watching Zoe try. Then Zoe wanted to climb the other wall — the one without the auto belay. I was a bit more apprehensive — again, I’m not a good climber and an even worse “faller” — but I tried and successfully “fell” to the poofy mat below from only a few feet high. I wasn’t willing to require a harder impact than that. When 2:45 came around, I was climbing on fumes and mostly watching by this point. I let Zoe have a few last climbs before she was finally ready to take off her uncomfortable shoes, too.

Ours wasn’t nearly the most intense climbing trip of the day — I wanted to pace myself — but I’m sure we were there the longest. I think we definitely got our moneys worth for the day pass and Zoe votes to go again soon. One of the good things about being a parent is playing the “old” card and sitting out when you get tired. It leaves me free to take pictures of my offspring, who is much more Spiderman than her mom.